If I pass; if I fail; if I drop out does anyone give a damn?

Today is results day for Scottish school kids. I have many thoughts on examinations in school (mostly that they're not the best barometer of knowledge or intelligence) especially how frequently they're used and how much emphasis is put on them.

When you consider the physiological changes that kids are going through at that age, putting them through a tough exam schedule seems backwards, especially when you consider how massive the range in maturity is across the students. Then you add in the difference between girls and boys in that age range and seriously try to tell me it's a good time to tell them their future depends on these results.

It doesn't. There is nothing you can do wrong at school that can't be fixed at a later date. Of course it takes longer and some real determination but if you've got the brain then the results will follow when you're ready. I taught for a while in a further education college and some of the students there were the most impressive I've ever found. A stark reminder that school isn't for everyone. Some blossom that bit later.

I cantered through school and didn't find exams stressful at all but those very facts meant I wasn't prepared for university at all. I was only 17 when I started but I just carried on from school like it was the next logical step. I never thought of doing anything else. Because of the way I coasted at school I didn't know how to plan studying sessions for Uni and worst of all I didn't know how to deal with something I didn't understand first time. So I did something really stupid. I concentrated on really knowing the stuff I did understand and ignored the rest. This obviously only got me so far so I didn't get the class of degree almost everyone thinks I should have (everyone I met when I was a postgrad assumed I got a First class honours - I very much didn't). The reasons for that are too many to list but my attitude was the principal one I fear.

Now when I look back I think if I knew what I did as a postgrad when I was an undergrad I would have done better and subsequently what I knew as a post doc would have served me brilliantly as a post grad student. All that really means though is experience is something gained immediately after needing it.

If I were to start it all again knowing what I know now I would get a better class of degree and I would write up the PhD thesis but those were my mistakes and I have to stand with them.

What I need to remember is that it isn't the academic qualifications you have that define who you are. I am much more than the Scientist my training marks me out as.